As we get older, compatibility is about more than good s*x and emotional support. But turn to some insomnia cures before you give up
The dilemma I have a new partner after my wife died three years ago. We are very compatible and happy together, emotionally and sexually, but the one distressing issue is our different sleeping requirements. I need a good, solid, uninterrupted nine hours and an early night, otherwise I get extremely irritable. She is more of a night owl, often waking in the night to use her iPad or even make a cup of tea. She has an amazing ability to catnap and fall asleep seemingly instantly, whereas I need a long period of peace and quiet before dropping off. I am also a light sleeper and her snoring is a problem for me. Earplugs don’t work. I accept that I’m a prodigious snorer myself, but that doesn’t seem to bother her so much. Do I carry
on retreating to the spare room, or is there another solution as I’d rather we stay together? We don’t live together (yet), but after a few days spent with each other,
I need a couple of days alone to catch up on my sleep!
Mariella replies And you say you’re compatible? There’s more to a relationship than good s*x and emotional back-up. When we mature, compatibility is about more intimate and intricate stuff than simply rubbing along during daylight hours. It’s all very well coexisting when you’re wide awake and rational, but what about when you’re barely conscious, immensely vulnerable and aching for a good night’s kip? That’s when coupledom is properly put to the test, and I should know.